The things I would do for you

The divorce is getting very ugly. I’m not surprised. I’m intensely curious but when I hear the details, or just see the look on his face when he comes home after receiving an email form her or her lawyer, my stomach turns and my heart breaks just a little. Why can’t people just  be reasonable? I know this is a stupid question to ask. I know there is a lot of anger, I even understand the greed in the face of fear, but the lying and misinformation and pure fiction of some of it just blows my mind.

SHE is the one who stopped the relationship. Did she think there would be no repercussions to her actions? That he would say, yes, fuck other people, spend my money, scorn and belittle me for years and I’ll gladly continue to support you financially forever (at at the level at which you believe you deserve, and not at the level at which my income allows). She isn’t fooling anyone she knows, but the danger is she just might fool the judge. And the round and round is costing a pretty penny, and not hers.

I walked around the market today, watching the shops close down, the tourists drinking their beer, eating their pastries. Wishing you were with me. I’m lonely with you gone all day. I think about last night, and how intense the sexual bond is, now that I’m in working order again. I had almost forgotten, in my misery. You rub the lips of my labia, thumb rough on my clit, fingers dipping gently to stroke my g-spot. You fuck me deeply, slowly, my leg thrown over your shoulder, your hand clutching my breast, my mouth. My breath catches and I stop breathing, eyes closed, lost in the pleasure of it all. You pause, take my face in your hands and say, “Breathe. Look at me and breathe!” and I do. Our eyes meet, your intense gaze frightens me a little, and my deep, even breaths unlock the emotion, the profound desire, the immediacy of my need for you, and I come. You lower your head onto my chest, I lick your neck from shoulder to jawline, you mumble something, and shudder and come, too. So sweet. So close. So intimate. Moments like this make me want to be with you. (forever).